Any Old Road

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Many days I’ve taken the long way home on ‘trips’ so far out that even I didn’t think I would make it back. I’ve known a few who didn’t.  I use to believe that any old road would take me there. Recovering from a hopelessness and futility that was beyond any human willpower that I could muster works much the same way. The disease of addiction is more than just mental; it’s spiritual in nature and I have to get down to causes and conditions. Bottles are symptoms of a bigger problem, and that is why my help has to come from the Divine. I know this because I’ve tried to come full circle and pull my life together in my own ways, and I ended up on a dead end road going nowhere, stuck on the one way rail we call existing. I had to humble myself enough to simply say, ” I need you God because I can’t stop on my own.” Everyday, I say the same simple prayer, “God, please help me stay sober.” That works, it really does. Finding new ways to live with life challenges can be overwhelming at times, but my old ways got me hammered. All my toolbox consisted of was that whammy and a few rusty nails. I do not have the power to fix me using my own toolkit. All I was doing was nailing the coffin shut. I found God thru surrender. I woke up yesterday full of fear and anxiety over situations outside my control, so I turned my thoughts to God thru prayer. At 7:30 in the morning, I received a phone call from a life long friend. Our conversation revolved around spiritual growth and how we could better serve. That’s God showing up, giving me a lift, and getting me home in ways I never even imagined before……good day!…b

One thought on “Any Old Road

  1. “it is sad because it is true”. Auch ! having a somewhat similar story, your post reached an “ignored” hurting spot deep down. Thanks for bringing those shitty dishonest trips back home to mind. Never again !

    good day ! /s

    Like

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