Work in progress

 

imageI’ve accepted I will never get it all right. My mother called it “paying for your raising.” Some of us just have to learn by trial and error I suppose, and when I don’t know the answers to life’s questions, I smile, act as if, and pretend like I still know what I’m doing. I swing and miss, and tell myself to keep swinging even when the fastballs are coming. I have to admit that I’m just a work in progress, and I have to practice principles before personalities: at meetings, in my home, with friends, colleagues, and with family. It’s not always easy, either. I try to stay connected spiritually, but I lose touch and my cool. I snap and trash spews out of my mouth like a salty sailor, then my thoughts start to race. Even when I’ve been taught to pause, my brain is over flooded with adrenaline and the pause button breaks sometimes. Maybe you have it all together, but I’m confessing I surely don’t. I was riding with a friend when he asked a simple but profound question today. “What do people do without God?”  From what I’ve learned, I did the best I could. I used basic instincts that once ruled me and now remember those were necessary for survival. If deep down in every woman, man, and child is the fundamental idea of God, then those instincts must be God given, too. I mustn’t forget that, but when they spin out of control is when I get in big trouble. My anger flairs up, my tongue rattles, and I become the very being I abhor: a babbling idiot. The biggest difference today is that I’m not a drunk babbling idiot. It takes work to pause when I’m agitated and frustrated, and it also takes a Power greater than me who works on my behalf. After all, He’s the reason I’m still here and still a work in progress….glad tidings of great joy!…b

 

 

One thought on “Work in progress

  1. Your doing a great job bro!! hang in there. Sometimes life is beautiful and perfect, sometimes it rains so hard you cant see the next step in front of you. Its all by faith and faith alone in the one who came and will come again, he made it all possible, and you are right it requires action with that faith. but as your friend I think you are doing a pretty good job. in Him, Bobby

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