wings to fly

Screenshot_2016-06-02-06-00-24-1If you have ever been thrown in a swimming pool and told to swim, then you will understand; or told to leap from the hay barn, or perhaps ride your bike with no training wheels for the first time. Only then in pure fright, will I  better understand what it means to grow wings and fly. Change is inevitable but difficult. It takes courage, stamina, and guts to allow experiences to shape us, rather than kill us.  It’s difficult letting go, watching loved ones hurt, and hearing stories of relapse. God spared a simple soul like mine to go thru some tough experiences in order for me to realize my purpose here. It never was about me getting all I could. It’s been  about learning to give of my time, energy, and talents along this side of life to help others. I’ve read all the stories, but it’s taken a few core people to show me how it’s done. It is simply done by doing: reaching out when I want to retreat, talking about my feelings openly, and working with newcomers. They remind me that nothing much has changed out there in the faux paus world of facadism. We are people who “normally would not mix”, but the comaraderie is so rare in the fellowship, that I hug guys today that I never would have shaken hands with before. It doesn’t make me less of a man, it makes me human, and that’s my reminder that we are all created with the fundamental idea of God. Deep down inside of me is a spirit transforming the way I think, act, and go about my day, and if my actions are not in line with my values, then my conscience bothers me. That is God. Taking what I’ve learned in recovery to a different level is where I want to go. I don’t want to stay stuck. I’ve been there, and the freedoms I get from staying sober is far better than I’d ever expected. It’s not what I say, but what I do that matters. People I’ve watched change; morph, right back into a human being again, just like me. Addiction is a subtle foe. It will kill me before my time if I don’t  ‘let go and let God’ and remain willing to take leaps of faith while growing wings to fly….good day!.. b

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