Creature comforts

But God doesn’t call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn’t come through.   FRANCIS CHAN

Faith invariably follows fear. At least that has been my experience. I don’t rant about politics, race, religion, or perhaps my own opinions, but I can share with you my experiences. Before I got sober, I lived in constant fear. Fear of what others thought, fear of change, and fear that I didn’t measure up to my own standards. And those are just a few. So what did I do? I drowned my fears in that easy, comfortable, numbing stage of a buzz. What my experiences have shown is that I appeared like I wasn’t scared of anything, so I acted on my own impulses to drown those fears out, and eventually even that quit working. Perhaps your reading this for the first time and thinking, ” but Im not the one with the problem.” Take heart because I, too, once thought I could quit on my own if life would just treat me right. As it turns out, I was the problem. It takes courage and willingness to admit and accept myself for who I am. But my only other option was to die in my own misery trying to get comfortable. I had enough “creature comforts”, but I had no real faith in God until I finally surrendered on May 10, 2012 to the idea that I really had no control over my drinking nor belief that I could quit on my own. God either is, or He isn’t, and today I am sober thru experiences that William James calls the “educational variety” found in the Appendix in the AA textbook simply called “Spiritual Experiences.” I had to learn the hard way, and nothing would stop me until I admitted how powerless I was over that first drink, pill, line, rock, or joint. Addiction is like that, but sometimes I think that one is better for me than the other. I have to discard those old ideas because they no longer work. I have to practice fearless honesty with my disease, and today my approach and views in life have so radically changed that I scarcely remember that old man. I need never forget him, lest I go back to those same fears that drove me straight back to the bottle. Today, I know that God comes thru because I see how He has worked in the lives of others, and I’ve experienced freedom from the bondage that once enslaved me…..  after all, in the end, there was no comfort in the bottle after all….good day!….b

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